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Weekly Doses of Pop-up Psych

We all make cringey mistakes and deserve to move on, rather than feel confused or regretful after an icky social situation. Each week, I will dissect a murky social, life cycle, or pop culture topic to help you understand, learn, and move on. As a former academic, I am a super-picky consumer of research (and you should be too) as well as the content I create and share, so those new solutions, data and/or additional resources have certainly met my approval.

How to Live a Life Filled with Inner Peace, Even Among Adversity

 

I used to think that living with inner peace was for the extreme elderly, who had a significant number of years and experiences under their belt or a rare luxury for younger people. Indeed there is a sense of inner peace that comes with aging, but they had to go through a lot in order to get to that point. According to the Stress in America study conducted by the American Psychological Association, 27% respondents disclosed that stress limited their abilities to function on a daily basis, which makes inner peace seem like a sexy, impossible, and overused cliche. We are still humans who need to feel those feelings of despair, while feeling in control of life. We can’t control all of our circumstances, but can certainly control how we react to things. 

We can live a life filled with inner peace among adversity by practicing forgiveness

 

Sixty-two percent of Americans disclosed to struggle with forgiveness. Forgiveness is for you; not them.  You can forgive someone else without even speaking to or receiving an apology from them. You can either hold on to anger and plot your revenge or move on and sleep soundly at night. Perhaps you need to forgive yourself, which is tough, but not impossible. To learn more about practicing forgiveness with yourself and others, here is an excellent source by Dr. Jeremy Sutton. 

forgiveness

We can live a life filled with inner peace among adversity by taking care of ourselves

We can thank the pandemic for making self-care more the norm than the exception. Self-care is more about the small daily practices that keeps you feeling whole and living “above the line”, as described by one of my favorite yoga teachers, retreat leaders (I highly recommend), dear friends, Wanda Feliciano the owner of Shine Yoga Studio in Maple Shade and Medford, New Jersey.  For me, it’s a good night’s sleep, a shower, a yoga practice, a nice walk with my dog, and a generous amount of chocolate.  Prior to the pandemic, self care was more about bubble baths, spa treatments, and other stuff that was more of a decadent treat than a required meal. I love decadence, but I learned that I am more of my best self when all of the above is included in my day. Here are some other great suggestions from Tiny Buddha.

self care

We can live a life filled with inner peace among adversity by resolving internal conflicts

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Woulda, shoulda, coulda are three words that burn our soul.  According to Daniel Pink, the regret expert, 82% of people at least occasionally feel a twinge of regret about some aspect of their life.  This could trigger physical health issues as well as increase anxiety and depression. Since we can’t go back in time, we can learn to embrace and live with those situations. You can either hang on to the past and miss what’s around you or accept it and live life to the fullest today, which is explored in Daniel’s book, The Power of Regret.

We can live a life filled with inner peace among adversity by looking within to evaluate what needs to change right now

Your inner voice tells you that something is not right through aches and pains, nagging thoughts, other feelings that manifest and look different for everybody. Ideally, you can unplug and take some time for yourself to listen to that voice to dig deep as to what you want and how to begin. Considering major life changes are best done with a neutral sense of support like a therapist who can help you process what is going on, how to proceed, as well as how to manage relationships and reactions throughout the journey. This is the time to reach out to your support team for listening ears.

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We can live a life filled with inner peace among adversity by practicing gratitude

I have yet to see a research study that does not support the positive relationship between practicing gratitude and strong mental health. Life definitely has its cruddy moments when we get bombarded with lots of stuff that’s annoying, but not terrible. However, in the middle of the mess, there is always something to feel grateful for, especially the little things. Focusing on what has been accomplished and elicits joy are the little flashlights that will help you find the way. Check out these tips to expand your gratitude practice

gratitude
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